Judul : Guinea Pigs, Disney, Dating & Humor
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Guinea Pigs, Disney, Dating & Humor
It's been such a looong time since I didn't post anything. As you might know, I'm a busy nigga.
I wasn't really planning to post a new entry, but just got this amazingly cute email, which I'm gonna answer at once:
Hola mi amigo Peruano :)
I hope you are doing well!The 5 stupid questions post was brilliant! Thanks for making me laugh!! :D
You haven't posted anything new in a long time, so I'm sorry if I'm interrupting a busy time for you.Hell we do! But mostly in the highlands. You know, Peru is divided into three natural regions- the coast (where this lazy blogger lives), the highlands (where they eat Guinea pigs & other weird stuff) and the rainforest (where they eat even weirder stuff.) See, I'm from Lima and have alwyas lived here, so I'm not familiar with Guinea pig 'delicacies.' However, we have so many immigrants in our city that we're plagued with exotic restaurants all around, and I've also met families where the parents or grandparents come from the highlands and... yeah they eat the Mickey Mouse thing. It looks just like a rat but without the tail.
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| We Peruvians are Mickey's Mouse Clubhouse's worst nightmare. |
I've heard stories about cooks catching rats and cutting off their tails to serve them as Guinea pigs, but I don't know if they're true. Anyways, I've never tried it and not willing to since my religion forbids me to eat anything that squeaks.
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| I've seen more appetizing things in the New York Subway. |
2. Have you ever seen the Disney movie 'The Emperor's New Groove'? It's set in Peru. Just wondering.
Hmmm no, but judging by the cover, it looks like another stereotype-infested Disney brainfart. I remember the first time I tried to watch a Disney movie, it was Beauty & the Beast, Mulan, Pocahontas or stuff -have you realized they all look the same?- and had to watch a Bugs Bunny Marathon to detox. Yeah I hate Disney. Warner Bros is much more realistic and funny. I don't let my daughter watch Disney. I'd bitch-slap her if she ever did. Bugs Bunny and Duffy are the idols she's supposed to grow up with. How can anyone prefer Donald Duck over the Animaniacs?
3. One of my friends is born and raised Peruvian but his family moved to America some years ago. He acts like he's dating me even though he has never said anything about it and vice-versa. Sometimes he will talk to me forever even if I need to go. He kisses me and is very flirtatious. Does he think we're together even though we've never even talked about it? Most Americans would not think so, but I don't know the relationship mentality in Peru. It seems to be very different in every country. So how does dating go in Peruvian culture?
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| Disney: Humilliating Blacks, Latinos and Middle Easterns since 1923. |
There's no such thing as an average Peruvian since we're all very different from each other, not only because we come from different regions but also because our social class, age group and cultural background. However, most of us have some things in common. First of all, we kiss our friends in the cheek and that's not considered flirtacious here. The younger generations are even more physical -I wonder how the hell they are if they spend 90% of their time fucking around in Facebook, iTunes and PlayStation- so physical contact does not mean much to us. Hell, I have to kiss my horrible workmates everyday, which is particularly difficult for an Asperger like me. As for your Peruvian Prince Charming being flirtatious, yeah, some of us are. Maybe he's really into white girls, or he's just used to flirting, or he might really like you. Who knows? I don't know how old he is, but I think it's important to know if he's in a serious relationship -or looking for one.
Dating in Peru can be quite different from dating in the US. We live with our parents until we get married -yeah even if we get married at 40 or something- so our dating culture is much more home-based. Although I see trends of that changing -I got students who live with their boyfriends or girlfriends- it's just not part of our culture and I don't think we ever accept cohabitation as much as Americans do. We don't move to the campus when we go to college either, so that makes it different too. I'd say a relationship gets really serious once you get closer to his/her family. I've seen lots of immigrants in the States who wanna date American girls just to have fun because they know dating is much easier there, but they all wanna marry a woman of their own background. We Latinos take relationships and marriage much more seriously -unfortunately I can see trends of that changing too- due to our family tradition.
Maybe your Peruvian Brad Pitt is just flirtatious by nature, easygoing, cheerful -the typical Latin Lover- so I suggest you take your time to see how serious he can be. Who knows? You guys may end up falling in love and living in Lima! :-)
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| Some Latinos are just fucking crazy for white girls. |
4. You've already mentioned a bit about how Peruvian humor is different in terms of racism. How is Peruvian humor different in other aspects, in general?
We love impersonation. Mainly political. As we don't rely on authorities, we love maming fun of them and impersonation shows are really popular. Leaders are humilliated every Sunday, pictured as thieves, murderers and scam artists. Also dressed as transvestites and even disguised as animals. Let's say a politician gets mad, then the impersonation gets much, much worse. One example: our former president's son -currently a Congressman- was seen in a home tape doing nasty sexual things with his dog -no kidding!- and it was immediately picked by comedians for their shows. As public zoophilia can be a bit embarrasing, the guy was mad at the comedians. Only to make it worse. He and his dog were mocked everyday on TV and radio shows, until he realized he just had to shut the fuck up and suck up his pride. And he made the right decision because now he's a Congressman and makes some FOURTEEN THOUSAND dollars a month, and -no kidding- may run for president in 2016 and win.
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| Our president is a murderer who led two coups and we just like to see him as Rambo. |
So there are no limits for our humor. Nothing's sacred. If you are the typical politically correct American who doesn't wanna mess with ethnicity or religion, then you'll be easily offended by our humor. Even disability is extremely fun to us. I have a friend who was born withouts legs, and we call him names like "Usain Bolt" or "Schumacher" (because he can be so fast on his wheelchair.) He replies making fun of our Asian friend, and the joke goes on focusing on every single aspect of our lives that can be used to have a laugh.
At the same time, we're pretty open to other kinds of humor. American sit coms such as Two and a Half Men and The Big Bang Theory are very popular, so are American comedies like American Pie or Jackass. I personally enjoy American shows like SNL or Mad TV because their impersonations are fantastic.
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